A little over a year ago, a few months after I quit my job, I was in a rough spot. I was excited to be taking some time off for self discovery and pursuing my dreams (I mean, who wouldn’t be?), but I was also really struggling a lot behind the scenes. I was grasping at straws trying to make things happen in the freelance writing world and coming up against a lot of dead ends. I had also just broken up with my boyfriend at the time (the firefighter, for my longtime readers), which added another element of change to a life that was already in flux. I felt like I no longer knew up from down. I was free floating and desperately trying to figure out my next step in life.

I can remember one day having a complete meltdown on my bedroom floor. There I was, having followed my heart and made some really big changes. I was doing everything I felt like I was ‘supposed’ to do, and I still found myself completely and utterly lost. It was as if the ground had been ripped out from underneath me. I was scared and confused. I no longer recognized my life and I felt like I had hit rock bottom.

As I’ve learned is often the case with self discovery, sometimes you have to hit a major low to have a breakthrough.

I’m not sure what prompted me to do so (I’ve never really been religious, mind you), but in the midst of that moment with tears streaming down my face I hit my knees and asked for help — from God, the Universe, whatever was out there. I wasn’t sure what I was searching for, I just knew I was beyond the point of being able to go it alone.

The details from that day are a little fuzzy (crying hangover, anyone?), but I can remember just feeling this huge release. I didn’t feel amazing right away, but I no longer felt completely alone. I sensed a loving energy alongside me and it was like I was being held, supported. It was a fairly new experience for me and I really wasn’t quite sure what to make of it. That very same day a friend suggested I take up meditation for the insomnia I was experiencing at the time (which I’m certain was due to the intense stress I was feeling). It helped immensely, and from that day forward I began a daily practice of prayer and meditation. A few days later, my mom bought me a copy of A Course in Miracles and my life pretty much transformed from that point on.

Let me back up. It wasn’t that spirituality was an entirely new idea for me — I was familiar with spiritual concepts, I’d read books by Eckhart Tolle, Gabrielle Bernstein and other spiritual teachers — it just took on a whole new meaning for me from that point on. It was like I made a commitment that day to open my eyes to a whole new world, and I’ve been soaking up as much of it as I can ever since.

So, why am I telling you all of this?

Well, I’ll be the first to admit that things have been a little, um, stale around here lately and I think a large part of that is due to this major piece of my life that I wasn’t sharing with you. I feel a lot of what I’ve written more recently has been lacking the personal aspect that I pride myself on bringing to the table, and that’s something I never want to compromise. Truthfully, it’s taken me getting to this point to really feel comfortable putting it all out there so to speak, but I want to put it out there because this is the direction my life (and hence this blog) has taken. My spirituality is a part of who I am so, naturally, it’s going to spill over into my coaching, my writing and all other aspects of my life.

So, what can you expect from here on out?

Even more sharing of my personal life and spiritual journey (you know how I do 😉 ).

Deeper, spiritual conversations (lots of wisdom from A Course in Miracles and more talk about the Universe and manifesting and the like – this is where it gets fun!)

A possible blog revamp? I’m still not sure yet.

Thank you as always for hanging in there with me on this and every journey. I am beyond grateful for each and every one of you. <3

xxoo

Kristi

Ever had a similar experience? What role does spirituality have in your life? I’d love for you to share!